If you are in favour of giving women and non-binary people a hand, so they can be as equal to men as possible, you may think you have a pretty good understanding of how to treat us well. But let's not forget that, under a patriarchy so baked into the system, sometimes going part of the way is regarded as enough.
It has often been remarked upon that some men regard women as chattel. Today I came across a self-identified feminist referring to a specific woman as a 'cow'. Instead of showing compassion for the woman's conservative views, which, while hurtful, are hurting that woman more than anyone else, the writer chose to insult and dehumanise her.
There are complex reasons why women try to bring other women 'back down to size', including having it done to them first, with no one having come to their aid to illuminate the power of treating everyone as a fully human being. I know that I have felt alone with my struggles, from time to time, and seeing an offensive woman as part of the sisterhood has been too challenging at times.
But I do think there is value in sticking with the notion that we are all fully human - even if (especially if?) we are sometimes cruel or inconsiderate towards each other. Recognising the full humanity in me makes me wonder about the full humanity of you... and give it space to gather vividness.
So instead of calling a woman - any woman - a cow, let's call her a wounded person. A sadistic person, perhaps. Misled by some of the miserable views out there. But unmistakably human. Let's shine self-compassion on the darker sides of humanity.
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