Subtle forms of homophobia

If you run in certain progressive circles in Western countries, it's increasingly unacceptable to hold an outrightly homophobic opinion. Unfortunately that doesn't mean that homophobia has been eradicated; it's simply taking on more sophisticated forms which, if left unchecked, can become insidious.

Growing up, I was exposed to predominantly heterosexual narratives. Anyone who has developed a love affair with books from previous centuries would know that homosexual narratives are uncommon to the point of invisible. And even though I have a very contemporary reading agenda for the most part, I am constantly surrounded by people who prioritise those heteronormative narratives, and are constantly deprioritising the lack of stigmatisation towards homosexuality.

People get inordantly excited about sexuality of a hetero bent, insisting subconsciously that there's something ultra-lucrative about a practice which often depends on male dominance and female submission (just take a look at how frequently women erase their family histories by changing their last name to that of their husband's, for example). They aren't even aware they are doing it, but it's similar to the way a racist reserves their highest attention and respect for humans who they identify as having shared characteristics. It's everywhere.

Heterosexuality can make you popular in a way that homosexuality can't. I speak from personal experience: people suddenly became more interested in sharing their time with me in high school upon the discovery that I was interested in men as well as women. It was like this whole new social circle opened up for me - and of course I wanted nothing to do with the bigots. It was a depressing wake-up call to the level of acceptance that I had previously been excluded from.

This is 2013, they say. Yes, it's 2013, and it's a homophobic year. Even though some countries have legalised same sex marriage, discrimination remains responsible for disproportionately high rates of depression and other forms of mental illness in the GLBT community.

Richard Florida, a leading academic (he self-styles himself as an Urbanist), has identified economic innovation as being led by three social groups, of which "gays and lesbians" are one. (The other groups are immigrants and bohemians.) This doesn't surprise me, because people who choose to have same-sex relationships dare to defy both the written and unwritten social codes. They have decided that they are secure enough within themselves not to cling to heterosexuality, but to pursue their own romantic (and/or sexual) interests, and that makes them more open-minded than the heteronormative status quo. (NB: I'm not saying that homosexuality is better than heterosexuality - love is love.)

Saying Hello to Taiwan

On the 30th of September I will depart Sydney for a 3 and a half week trip to Taiwan. I can't wait! I'm flying with Vietnamese Airlines and I will stay overnight at Ho Chi Minh City (previously known as Saigon) before continuing on to Taipei. I plan to spend 8 days in Taipei before making my way down the island and visiting a friend of mine called Jenny. I might attend this festival, if I can fit something scheduled in, in between being as spontaneous as possible.

Taiwan appeals to me because it complements traditional Chinese culture with a functional democracy and a youthful sensibility. I plan to drink more bubble tea than you can poke a bamboo stick at, visit as many temples as possible and catch contemporary modern art where I can find it.

You might have heard that Australia elected Tony Abbott to be our next Prime Minister. This is pretty depressing from a progressive point of view, with The Independent newspaper reporting that Australia will be 'less green, more mean'. Abbott opposes marriage equality and thinks that there is too much emphasis on how much Aboriginal Australians were discriminated against in history books. He has also been compared to George W. Bush, which is sadly appropriate, given his tendency to make gaffes, social conservativism and general idiocy.

My psychiatrist suggested I take up drinking. (No joke! I'm sampling an Italian red wine as I speak.)

You may remember that I was very glad to be back 'home' in Sydney earlier in the year... well, I've decided to continue trying to move overseas, even if it's difficult and I find it difficult to make new friends at first and I have to make some sacrifices on the way. I just feel like I have 'done' Sydney, and now it's time for something new.

In the meanwhile, I will be continuing to travel to great places like Taiwan... next on my list are Argentina and Chile (remember how I've had my eye on Argentina for a while?), and after that I am thinking of Bali, Israel and somewhere in Africa (possibly Nigeria).

Now, how do you say "Hello" in Chinese again...?

Equality between women and men

Have you noticed that we usually talk about 'men and women' and not about 'women and men'? If we are to achieve equality for all we must get to the stage where we feel comfortable using both these phrases interchangeably. That isn't the only thing that must change. We must have equal representation (about 50%) of women and men in politics, in boardrooms, and in other workplaces. This alone would revolutionise how we perceive men and women, but there's a lot more to equality than this. For now, though, it's a good place to start. I'm sick of women not being taken as seriously as men. In 2003 I wrote to the Oxford University Press because they used 'he' to speak for humanity in general on their website, not 'they' or 's/he'. The woman who responded to my complaint failed to find fault with this privileging of the male over the female. I wonder how she would respond today in the light of the renewed feminist consciousness the world is currently experiencing. Would she have the same ignorance?
It took me a long time to notice that most protagonists in everything from children's books to crime fiction are male. A woman learns to put herself in the shoes of a male early on, to prioritise 'his' voice over 'hers'. This leads to an imbalance in our society where men are seen as the default setting for humanity, and we assume that the male point-of-view is universally relevant. What we need is more stories that focus on the female experience - approximately half of protagonists should be female, and equally authoritative. That is what equality means to me, and it would change a lot of things in the world, not least of which the self-esteem of all of society's members for the better. I don't believe for a second that men really want to be dominant. I believe it is a burden, the disadvantage that comes with being advantaged, and they would want change as much as female feminists do if they really had the time and space to think about it (and do some soul-searching). All of us need to help each other understand the obstacles to understanding the other, so that we can overcome them, and have females empowering males and males empowering females equally.

Parody of 'Blurred Lines' by Robin Thicke

On not wearing a bra

"You really need it," an acquaintance told me with good-natured amusement when I admitted that I was happy to go bra-less - my cup size is E, so it's quite noticeable when I don't subject my chest to uncomfortable restraints. But the thing is, I don't need it. Not at all. I leave my bra behind as often as I can work up the courage to face the negative attention. I feel infinitely more comfortable, and since it's a conspicuous sign of my activism I don't necessarily need my custom-designed tee with Feminist written on it to indicate visually that I am one. 
As for the lash-back from the more conservative elements of Sydney's eastern suburban society, I try not to let it get to me, especially since they are in the minority. Most people don't seem particularly affected. After all, it's not like they haven't seen a breast in its natural state before. The freedom I feel when I choose to go bra-less often makes up for any uncomfortable glances I might receive.
A recent French study claims that women who don't wear bras have greater pertness to their breasts, which is just one more reason to go without.
I believe that bras are another means of controlling women's bodies in society. Women are expected to conceal their nipples (which are usually read as sexual) and to have their chests conform to certain norms of contour (to be more easy on the eye). Who's to say that the rounded shape that most bras encourage is more aesthetically pleasing than a breast left unlifted? A lot of us have been brought up to believe that this is true, but then we have been exposed to very few alternatives, and not given enough opportunities to develop a different taste. I would like to see more women go bra-less, so I can get a chance to find the natural look more appealing.

Guilt, Curiosity

I like to think of myself as pretty enlightened. My best friend used to be racially identifiable as of a different originating continent to mine. Most of my friends follow this pattern, truth be told. Yet I feel like I am handicapped when it comes to appreciating a great number of the world's cultures. So much so that I feel obliged to pay extra attention to people just because I don't have much experience with their racial group, the idea being that I can learn more about them if I increase my focus and keep my mind open for just that extra time period.

The problem with this is is that it's at the expense of my instincts. I have an intuitive insight into human nature and if I am choosing to pay extra attention to someone it's because instinctively I feel like I've already given them enough. Perhaps the most appropriate word is 'overcompensation' for my perceived ignorance. I would do well to remember that the whole point of human interaction is to appreciate people for who they are, not their phenotype. If I want to get closer to someone, my instincts will tell me, and I need to learn to trust them every time.

In my ideal world, human connections are forged not based on exteriors but genuine curiosity.

Thinking Green

Iceland is known for a natural beauty as stark as it is unusual, and as verdant as it is treeless. It´s part of its unique calling card, yet I have an idea for the nation: what if all 319,000 of you planted a tree? It might seem like I want Iceland to be just like everywhere else, but I see a vision of the world in which Iceland becomes one of its most powerful ´lungs´, purifying the air from a position no one else could. Every little bit helps, Iceland! Spread your butterfly wings and prepare to take the world by storm! ;D

Norway is known for indulging its sense of nostalgia these days, with much ado made over the burning of firewood. The sad thing is that burning those Norwegian woods has a deleterious effect on the environment´s natural ability to fight pollutants. It seems we need to sacrifice some of those unhelpful traditions in order to meet the challenges of a rapidly changing climate. Every stick of firewood that is left as a tree helps, my dear Norwegians.

The entire world needs a timely reminder that switching from petrol to electric cars would make a profound difference in reducing carbon emissions. Let´s not wait until the weather threatens to get totally out of control; let´s act in constructive ways now! Let your enthusiasm for the world around you shine.