40 and Childfree: Stressed out by children

At the supermarket today, there was a family of four in front of me at the self-serving cashier, the youngest members of which looked about 4 and 6 years old respectively. They kept pawing at the items in the baskets or taking them out and handing them to their mum before she was ready to key them in. “There are other people waiting!” she had a resigned tone, trying to keep them under control. “Don’t drop that avocado!” emerged as the youngest gathered up two large items in her small hands and pushed them in her general direction. “I am not taking you grocery shopping again - you have been an absolute nightmare!”

I felt unhappy and stressed out just watching this unit. The adult partner of the mum, who fit the look of a typical cis man, watched on idly as the mum tried to juggle multiple tasks. He could have stepped in or guided the little horrors away from the machine, but he did not. 

So do I feel validated in my choice to be childfree? Absolutely! I find life stressful and overwhelming even without kids- I can’t even imagine what kind of toll it would take on my mental health to add them to the mix. 

I can handle the disapproval of conservatives, the general sense that I am out of sync with society, and prying questions, because - hey - at least they’re not prying *hands*. It would indeed be an absolute nightmare to have a kid wreaking havoc on my surroundings.

Some childfree people are eager to share how much they love kids. “I love being the ‘cool aunt’!” they insist, which makes it harder for those of us who associate kids with unpleasantness to be upfront about our feelings. But I’m here to tell you that kids irritate the heck out of me. 

If I am to deal with people, give me an adult over a kid anyday. Adults know how to behave themselves in public. They do not squeal at random, run around like so much of a moving hazard, make unreasonable demands and generally destroy the peace and quiet. 

There may be some who think badly of me for my irritation, but what’s the point of having a blog if you can’t be honest on it?

I’m so happy I never had kids, and I intend to keep it that way. That is my version of ‘living the dream’.